know whats weird? day by day nth seems to change but slowly everything seems different

Sunday, April 29, 2007

` 1:10 AM

people around me seems to get whatever they want easily. getting what they want in life without much difficulty. getting into the final round of a prestigious scholarships just like that. getting grades most people wished for. being well off while mosr people are not. getting into courses that only the top of the top can get in. why? why people are so damn lucky. they practically strolled in their life without any hiccups. they know what they want and they get it. i tried bloody fucking hard but its down the drain at the end of the day.

on the other hand. perhaps they are more hardworking to achieve their goal while we just talk. talking is cheap. maybe its time to put this words into actions and work our socks off. i want to get a scholarship while in uni. i want to go overseas to work while in uni. i want to enrich my pathetic life while in uni.

but i am in the army now.....

nxt wk i will be outfield from thurs till sat. great. a wkend burnt.

i want to do something to save my life from being mundane and to have at least something to feel great about when i look back at my life and that i can proudly tell my grandchildren when they asked me about it. and i need to do it fast.

Friday, April 20, 2007

` 11:50 PM

fukai mori- do as infinity

Even now we must be hiding the hearts
We left behind deep deep in the forest

People too exhausted
To search
Disappear
Into the eternal darkness

If we were still young now
I'm sure we could probably still see them

As we live little by little we lose
Covered by lies and falsehoods
Standing paralyzed,
Unable to speak.

The days going by when we don't
Take in the blue blue sky
They are changing.
Step outside the frame, live for the moment

That rusty heart will pump again.
If you recognize the
Rhythm of time,
You'll be able to fly again.

As we wander wherever we may go, we live on.
In search of the light I believe in
I take off with you, now.

As we live little by little we lose
Covered by lies and flasehoods
Standing paralyzed,
Unable to speak.

As we wander
Wherever we may go
We live on.
Close off the road we look back upon

Walking eternally
Standing paralyzed
Unable to speak
Living eternally.

Standing paralyzed
Moving eternally.

this is one of my all time favourite song from do as infinity. the melody is nice and the lyrics is wonderful. today we went east coast park for our out camp run. the bus past by dhs. the road to dhs. the route i always take from the bus stop to dhs. the long walk. the big macdonalds and KFC. the kallang netball and tennis centre.kampong arang food contre. all the memories came flooding back. i know once gone. its gone forever and we will be left chasing the shadows of our own past. i seem to thinking alot of the past ever since i came into army... depressing

anyway HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY KAYAN!!! CHEERS AND STAY HAPPY!!! :):)

special thanks to wendy for the simple yet touching card you sent ll the way from down under :) i will wrtie more often i promise (",) pls take gd care of yourself k nu er

Sunday, April 15, 2007

` 2:20 AM

celebration was a simple affair. went to meet yx after driving lesson. after lessons. my instructor allowed me to drive all the way to eunos. though its a shrot journey but the feeling is fantastic haha. we went to central. a new place overlooking clarke quay. we tried out this japanese restaurant which she booked earlier. its fucking posh. jus ordering some food cost us 100+ bucks. this is definitely the most expensive meal i have ever eaten and known! i feel so guilty for making her spend so much.

after the meal. we walked around clarke quay and checked out the night life. it was bustling w activities. many eateries and bars are filled with people. i will post up the pictures once i got hold of them haha. we walked all the way to esplanade and i impatiently waited till midnight before i can open my present. all in all. it was simple yet significant.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MYSELF!!

special thanks to yi xian. adelene. le jia. jia jie. kayan. andy .xin hui. maxine. junie for the warm messages u all have sent me which i have personally replied each and everyone of you.

thanks kayan for the thoughtful card you have sent me :)
thanks andy for the nice and emotional email taht you have sent me.
thanks le jia for the effort you took to cycle to my hse and chat w me late last night.
thanks wendy nu er for the overseas sms you sent to me :)
thanks adelene for preparing a present for me. :)
special thanks to yi xian for everything you have planned and spent. i love it very much. thank you baby~! (psst. thou she should not have spent that much :S)

im a yr older now. sucks :(

Sunday, April 08, 2007

` 11:22 PM

i first saw it when i was touring england with the string ensemble people 6 years ago. when i was a 14 year old kid. it was held at her majesty's theatre in london. i dint know much bout the show then. all i knew was its freaking popular. it dint leave a very deep impression on me then. maybe partly cos i was too young to understand the true essence of the show.

it came to singapore after 6 long years. and i am glad i spent some money to catch this fantastic musical. the phantom of the opera is truyl amazing. the song the cast the spirit of the whole musical. i know i do not have the knowledge to comment on the technical stuff but on the whole i feel absolutely great bout this musical. memories came flooding back when i saw the whole muscial. the young me trying to decipher what the hell they were singing and trying to convey.le jia. wendy. i hope you all remembered all the sweet things that happened in london 6 yrs ago. 6 yrs. its long yet it seems like yesterday to me. so many things had happened to each of us and we have grown up. another yr and we will be officially adults.can you imagine how fast time flies. no words to aptly describe.

Past the point of no return
The final threshold
The bridge is crossed
So stand and watch it burn
We'’ve passed the point of no return.....

we have already passed some points of no return in our own lives. haven we?